Monday, July 31, 2006

Your 2006-2007 Laker Roster...in haiku format!

Kwame Brown

Bitched out by Jordan
Revitalized by Jackson
If only he could catch…

Kobe Bryant

Tenacious scorer
Frequent ballhog and rapist
Number eight no more

Andrew Bynum

They say that high school
Kids take time to develop.
At least he’s seven feet.

Brian Cook

He’s big. He can shoot.
Don’t ask for anything more
‘Cuz he can’t do it.

Maurice Evans

Acquired for Samb
I hear he plays good defense
I hope that’s not a lie

Jordan Farmar

Jews in basketball
Are reporters or owners.
This kid takes the court

Aaron McKie

Solid in Philly
Should have been “Ron Harper lite”
Please retire right now

Chris Mihm

A seven footer
With a nice shooting touch and moves,
Shouldn’t he score more?

Lamar Odom

Six foot ten inches
A multitude of mad skills
Kobe’s own Scottie

Smush Parker

Undrafted point guard
Solid in season, choked after.
Let’s teach him to shoot!

Vladimir Radmanovic

Vladimir now
Only when he learns to flop
Will he be Vlade

Ronny Turiaf

Heart problems are gone
Rebounds, hustle, dunks and blocks
The French Mark Madsen

Sasha Vujacic

Euro who can shoot.
Season highlight: trash talked Nash.
Too bad Nash bitched him.

Luke Walton

A Phil favorite
Son of “throw it down big man”
Student of the game

Shammond Williams

Quite short shooting guard
Not good enough to play point
Two mil down the drain.

5 Comments:

Blogger Mini Me said...

That was hilarious! By far my favorite was:

Euro who can shoot.
Season highlight: trash talked Nash.
Too bad Nash bitched him.

Great stuff...You are the next William Shakespeare.

10:53 PM  
Anonymous Brian Dub said...

The first haiku was,
unfortunately, not a
haiku. fuk dis shit.

10:40 AM  
Anonymous Brian Dub said...

Forgive my disdain.
Half of these are not haikus.
Please brush up your skills.

10:43 AM  
Blogger Mini Me said...

Brian Dub...do you want a Haiku? How about my butt and your face? Oh wait that isn't a haiku...that is a mirror image.

11:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

if u call someone a rapist... at least mask it in haiku

10:50 PM  

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